Day 4: Why Is Conceiving The Only Way?

Growing up, I thought that the only way to have children was to conceive them myself. Not in the way that kids don't know anything. But, I just thought that that was what was expected of me as a woman. In the past few years of "Adulthood", I have given children some thought. No mom, I am not at the point in my life where I feel ready to have children. However, when It comes to children my mind and my heart will be left open.

The majority tend to conceive. Then, if they are unable to, they may turn to a surrogacy. Surrogacy in Canada can cost anywhere from $58,000 to $90,000, but many will go to great lengths to feel like their child is their child. Adoption in Canada however is free, unless you adopt from abroad, then It can be up to $30 000. https://www.todaysparent.com/getting-pregnant/infertility/what-you-need-to-know-about-adoption-in-canada/ Often, fostering and adopting are last resorts, but why?

The reason this topic felt relevant to me is because last night, my parents were discussing a family that had adopted a child. They were saying something like, "He's not their real child, they adopted him or something." I being the person that always tries to make people see differently went on to counteract their argument. I said that If I am able to adopt children in the future, they will be my children, because I will raise them. Just because the child doesn't have my DNA doesn't mean that it's not my child.

When I hear most people discussing adopting children, the children are often referred to as "not their children". Which is really sad. There are so many children that end up in adoption centres, group homes, and temporary foster homes. There have definitely been many success stories with fostering. However, many situations are people taking advantage of the system to make money off of it, when that money is supposed to go to the children.

A lot of people see children that were put up for adoption as "damaged", like they must have issues because they were given up. Sometimes that may be the case, how would you feel if your parents gave you up?

I think every parent can agree that raising any child can prove difficult at times. Some kids need more care and attention than others, and that's okay. I believe that it is important to think about adopting as a way of having your own children. Granted, at first it would be like having a sleepover with a stranger. Then, depending on the age of the child, you could see them warm up to you within a matter of months (possibly years). This process to me is kind of like relationships. They take time to develop and grow. If we can fall in love in a matter of days, weeks, and months, then our hearts are capable of loving any child as our own.

Within Canada according to https://cyc-net.org/profession/readarounds/ra-papp.html approximately 1200 children are adopted each year. Where as around 2000 children are adopted from outside of Canada by Canadians. Adopting can take anywhere from 9 months to 9 years. Most adoptions are of babies. A lot of people that adopt want to raise from that newborn stage, often looking outside of Canada as it's rare to find newborns within Canada's organizations. Which leaves a lot of kids without ever having that forever home and family due to their age. Which is why adopting within your home country is very crucial.

I want to recommend this movie to watch if you're considering adoption, or if you just want to watch a great movie. This movie is comedy packed, and very heart warming. It's about a couple that go through the process of becoming foster parents. Through the trials and tribulations it shows you how rewarding and amazing it can be. I swear I cry every time I watch this movie, and no I'm not going to tell you how many times I have watched it.

Here's the trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IUfZq3DUd3Y

If you want to watch it, it's on Netflix!

How can you resist?

ANYWAY

Thank you humans for reading, I hope I have inspired you to open your hearts and minds.

x

Kailee